Hi everyone, my name is Anjeliq. I have struggled with anxiety and aggression for years. I’ve encountered many adverse childhood experiences that were very hard to process and eventually led me into dark places as I entered into my adolescence. I wasn’t aware of what it meant to take care of my mental health or the effects it would have on my life. As a teenager I developed harmful habits early on. I struggled with addiction, self-harm, aggression, and suicidal tendencies until I was about 19. It was around this age that I realized I was hurting myself in so many ways and that I hated who I was. It was in my immense moments of shame and self-loathing that I realized I was running from myself and trying to escape the pain that I felt. Because of this path that I took the traumatic experiences only became more frequent.
This was the beginning of my journey to self help and healing. I found myself through prayer and spirituality; I found support from family and close friends. I finally became aware of the fact that I had a lot of inner work to do.
Prior to this moment I hadn’t even considered that I was suffering mentally and emotionally. I didn’t realize that my behaviors manifested from my past experiences and childhood trauma.
As I began to work and reflect on myself I also began my journey as an educator working with young children and with that came deep understanding and awakening.
I still work to heal my inner child while I now raise my own. My daughter Lototele has been an inspiration to me, and my journey in motherhood has only helped me to grow as a woman and motivated me to work toward becoming a whole, healthy individual.
Taking care of your mind, body, and spirit is a daily effort. I am so thankful for the people who love and support me, and for the people who recognize all good things in me that I still struggle to see.
Some days I feel like I take 10 steps backward. Other days I feel like I’m fine and I’ll never need therapy again. What I’ve come to realize is that it is an ongoing effort and responsibility. It’s okay to feel like you failed some days. Show up for yourself in any way you can. We all deserve good things even if we feel that we are unworthy because our past/present actions define us. They don’t. There are safe spaces. There are people who will accept you and hear you no matter what. Find those people and keep them close. You don’t have to face the battle alone. We can.